Once again while in rest it came to me. I was in quiet with my feet up on the chaise when I scrolled over The Beatles in India on my tv set. I had wanted to watch this documentary and was looking for the right time to take it in, I would appear I found my time. The focus of the film being the influence of India’s music, culture and meditative practices on The Beatles music. Being an openly huge fan of their music I was interested to see India’s influences on their music. Personally I had spent decades teaching children new to Toronto, coming from all over India and had grown very fond my students and families. I wondered what drew The Beatles into the culture of India.
It turns out The Beatles, specifically George Harrison had an interest in the musical instruments and music coming from India’s musicians. This led to lessons, retreats and eventually the experience of meditation. Personally, I had been practicing meditation for over a decade in my life. However, much changed when I was diagnosed with ME and disability.
Early in recovery I practiced meditation often, sometimes for the whole day in rest but this was a simple awareness practice trying to keep my out of control nervous system more regulated. At this time, all I was of ability to do in my days was sit in quiet rest and mindfulness focused on healing and moving forward from the current hell I was suffering from. In time, I needed less meditative practice and more real life awareness but was unable to dedicate time to both. It would seem that my life has turned a curve once again, moving forward ever so slowly and gifted me a period of time each day where I am not physically functioning but in a meditative experience as I become awake daily . A time which allows me to be in meditation without any negative condition worsening. I now have ability to practice meditation and one other daily task such as painting.
In fact, one meditation practice that I has been able to remain part of my life for four years is deep sleep meditation. Early in my healing, I was learning what my new type of sleep looked and felt like. Prior to becoming unwell I had a sensational ability for long deep sleep, the kind that is restorative like you wake up fresh ready to take on a new day. Things changed quickly once I began living with M.E., one of the best ways for me to fall into a light sleep was through a deep sleep meditation upon settling into my bed nightly. I had success with this method of sleep meditation and have continued the practice nightly for several years, the cd plays all night long, every night. I often wonder if my cd or the player will stand the test of time.
Truthfully, I believe meditation has fuelled my artistic practice. It is in quiet moments in the garden that painting compositions reveal themselves. It is in calm meditative like states when I do my best working during my painting practice. The meditative practice allows for me to live in the moment, simply. Something that I had to learn to live at peace with chronic illness and disability.
Now a two hour window each day upon waking is perfect to implement my practice of yoga including breathing, meditation and perhaps in the future yoga poses. I also had participated in many yoga classes prior to becoming unwell and aimed to make this practice part of my daily life. It looks like this will be a practice I take with me through life and truthfully now I can’t see my life without this peaceful practice.
Jane Holden - Art exploring the quintessence of moments. 